What It Feels Like to Connect with Your Inner Child

We unloaded the wooden rocking chair from my mom’s van. The same chair she and my dad stained from naked wood before I was born. The chair that rocked newborn babies, entertained climbing toddlers, and hosted many time-out sessions in its years of service to our family. My mom finally decided to part with it, and I gave it a new home beside my bedroom window. I ran my fingers over the nicks and dents from falling objects, flying toys, and rambunctious pets. The stain appeared lighter–thinned by years of friction. Despite its scars, it remains mostly unchanged, a pillar […]

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What a Summer Drought Taught Me About Life

The air was dry and humid, almost too thick to breathe. I had pushed the stroller less than halfway around the lake. At twenty-five weeks pregnant, I thought maybe we should turn back. As I panted along, I felt as tired as the withered vegetation surrounding me. The lush green grass of early spring looked more like desert sand. A steady stream of crisp brown leaves trickled down, preparing for an early death. The plants drooped in despair, giving up hope for the much-needed moisture that still hasn’t come. Sweat rolled down my back – another warning sign. Go home. […]

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How to Process the Guilt of a Near-Tragedy

Two days before my daughter’s second birthday, I decided that I needed to clean my garage. The forecast called for rain, and we would likely have to put tables and chairs out there. And what a mess! I put her down for a nap and fired up the shop vac. Less than thirty minutes later, I heard her calling me on the baby monitor. She usually sleeps for three hours! It’s nearly impossible for me to stop a project before finishing it, so I brought her out there with me and continued vacuuming. She made several attempts to get my […]

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How Children Open Our Eyes

There is a dead beetle outside our front door. This is not something I would normally notice, but my seventeen-month-old daughter runs to the door multiple times a day saying, “bug! bug!” She actually wants to go out and see this dead bug. She crouches down next to it and points and says “shhh” and I let her believe that it’s just sleeping. This has been a part of our routine for almost a week now and you would think I would just get rid of the bug, but I can’t because it seems like such a highlight in her […]

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